Did I ever mention that the adage, “If it ain’t one thing, it’s something else” will be the title of my future autobiography? Because it seems to apply more to my life than anything else.
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From the category archives:
The 21 Day Brainstorm Blogging Project
It’s just where I was in his head. I was suddenly drained of all that power I’d had. I began ranting like a mad-(wo)man. I mean, what was the point of the sexual revolution brought on by the 60’s and all this new-age liberal belief that we were in control of our sexual identities and that we should own our desires if, at the end of the day, we had to go slinking back into our Victorian igloos, maintaining a false sense of propriety and blue-balling ourselves mercilessly just to seem pure enough to pull in a man?
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I hugged myself as I walked down the street. I even lost myself in my haze of self-pity and shed a few tears on the bus. As I walked the final few blocks home, I felt like I was in one of those early 2000’s teen dramas – you know where the beautiful heroine has just been forced to eat a bit of humble pie and she’s walking down the street, dejected and alone, maybe there’s a little Michelle Branch playing in the background. I thought there was nothing I wanted to do more than lie in bed, cry my eyes out, and go to work the next day secure in the belief that I was meant to be alone and pitiable.
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Today was a special day on the old Brando calendar. Is it my birthday? Not quite. Did I finally have sex with Will Smith? Nope (that’s tomorrow.) Did I get a date? Ha! Let’s not even go there… So why was today special? Today was the day that the snow on the streets had finally [...]
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I have a confession to make. I’m not really black. I’m really a pure-blood Irishman who got locked in a Hollywood Tans booth for hours on end, for three consecutive days. Do you believe that? … You do!? Screw you. You can kiss my Big, Black, Beautiful, Bodacious, Benevolent Butt. (That was alliteration…bitches) Ok, for-like-seriously-though, [...]
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I’m usually a lover of all things furry (and even of a few things slimy and covered in a thick mucus membrane). Dogs rank higher on my care-rometer (yes, I actually use that term) than most humans, and while cats and I have had a love-hate relationship since I was in diapers, I can nonetheless [...]
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